Changing
by Invader-Fifi
Summary: I was once a good boy. I was well behaved, proper, and pure. When I was young I would play by myself silently. I found it too silly to play aloud. Even when others were around, I found myself isolated. And I hate it.
1. Prologue

I was once a good boy.

I was well behaved, proper, and /When I was young I would play by myself silently. I found it too silly to play aloud. Even when others were around, I found myself isolated. Whether or not they isolated me, or I found it easier to isolate myself is unknown to me. I was happy, and that is all I care about.

I suppose it is okay though. I was never really involved in any drama. Then again, I never really had any friends to begin with. And any friends I had were too kind to be so cruel to each other. There was one time though. I was in first grade.

I had just moved to Arizona from Washington. A whole new school. My first friend there was a girl named Amalia. She was a really pretty Mexican girl. I only talked to her because we were going to the same bus. I supposed now, looking back, she might have liked me. I don't see why. I was really dorky with my red shirt and purple overalls. Soon after I met my second friend, Miranda. She was a Caucasian girl with bushy yellow hair. They were my best friends.

Out of the blue, Amalia got jealous. She accused me of liking Miranda more than her. I tried to explain to her that they were both my best friends and I had equal affection. She refused to believe me. She then ordered that I stop being Miranda's friend or I stop being hers. I was torn, I didn't want to lose my very first friend, but I didn't want to lose Miranda either; she was a joy to be around. So, I did what any first grader would do, I decided to stay being Amalia's friend, while being secret friends with Miranda. Eventually, Amalia found out and we stopped being friends. Soon after, I moved.

My father was in the military and we moved often. Not often enough to really mess with my education, but enough to destroy any relationships I could have had when I was younger. However, by that time, My father had already served six full years of service in a special Nuclear program or something. He came home as soon as time offered. So at that time, we were trying to find an affordable yet permanent place. We moved only two times after, into the house I now currently reside at. Much has happened here. I met my two long-term friends, Ed and Eddy.

Even though we didn't become friends right away, they were there for me though the thick and thin. My actual first friend was Daisy. Coincidentally we became friends because of the bus. She sat near me in class, and when I was finally able to ride the bus, she was on there as well. We became good friends, and she introduced me to her friend, Kevin. He was a seventh grader and he also rode my bus. He always sat next to this girl named Nazz. The whole bus ride home, he was showing off and making jokes. He was the center of attention. I was envious. I had never learned to overcome my shyness in such a way. I suppose what I am trying to say is that... I have always been good, and well... I'm sick of it.


	2. Old and New Friends

I have lived at this house for more than four years now. A new record. I have made many friends and lost more. When I first met Kevin, we both got off the same stop. We continued to engage in an idle chat and eventually we became friends. I remember being happy to actually have a guy friend. We had switched emails and would converse every now and then. Nazz would follow Kevin around, and Daisy would follow me, and we eventually became a small circle.

It didn't last.

Another girl named Andi moved in. She and Daisy became close friends really fast. Closer than we ever were. Well, why shouldn't she... I am a male, no matter how feminine I could be. That was probably the barrier between us. Daisy slowly slipped between the cracks and made her way away from us. Soon after, she moved.

Then one day, I went to the park with my remaining friends. After a while of just just talking, joking, and laughing, we decided to play truth or dare. Kevin always chose dare, trying to prove he wouldn't back down from anything. Nazz and I tested his durability and he proved faithful. Nazz chose more of the truth, while I always chose truth. After a few rounds, Nazz made a gutsy move. She dare Kevin to to _kiss_ me. Me.  
>I felt the blood rush to my face, and I immediately adverted my eyes. Kevin turned pink and immediately refused saying he wasn't gay and didn't feel like experimenting. Nazz did everything she could to persuade him. She brought in his record of never backing down from any dare, she promised him food, she promised candy. Eventually, Kevin faltered.<p>

Awkwardly, Kevin scooted towards me. After a while, he looked at my face directly, I looked at everything else but him. He grabbed my chin, pulled me closer, and forced me to look at him. His face was red, and his breath hot. I was no different. Everything went in slow motion. His face was getting nearer and nearer. I couldn't help one small glance at his lips, because I could already feel them even though they weren't there. His pink lips softly brushed against mine, and instantly were gone.

"There I did it!" Kevin shouted. He cleared his throat and repeated his phrase. "I did it."  
>His arms were crossed and he didn't look at me. I stared at the table. Dumbfounded. I couldn't believe that had happened. I told myself many times Kevin did it to prove that he was a man, and wasn't afraid of anything. I then realized that there was a slight throbbing in my pelvic area. I glanced down and realized there was a small bump. I was completely embarrassed, but incredibly thankful that I wore baggy shorts all of the time. After an awkward thirty more minutes, we all departed. That was when I started doubting my sexuality.<p>

I avoided Kevin. I was far too embarrassed, especially after what I did when I returned home. Eventually, I saw less and less of him. We stopped emailing, and he continued to high school.

Some time during all of this, my friendship with the other Eds began to blossom. It was an interesting story. When I first moved in, they had tried to talk once, but Daisy was calling me. I had no time to chat. Sometime later, they scammed me. Eddy had a stand that said 'Bottomwess' and an arrow pointing to Ed. His English never really got any better. Eddy told me that for only twenty-five cents, I would get to watch Ed eat a whole television set. I knew it was physically impossible, and so I willingly gave him two. Then I watched. He swallowed the television and Eddy at the same time. I ran to my house, sick to my stomach. I was terrified, but my damned curiosity got the better of me. I just had to know, how could he do such an impossible act with ease. I will not explain what happened after. That memory is safely locked away in a vault that nothing will ever penetrate. Never.

Since then, I began to help with their scams, making them more...reasonable. After all, I wanted jawbreakers as well. Eddy told me all about his past with Kevin. It is quite a tale. Throughout the years, we had so many adventures. Wins, and losses. We always had a great time nonetheless. I could never shake off what had happened between Kevin and I though. We met more people, and I just needed to know. I kissed multiple girls, trying to achieve that same affect. Nothing. Only something similar had happened when Kevin dared Eddy to kiss me. It only confused me more. The evidence was there, yet I didn't want it to be.

It only became worse yesterday. When Kevin texted me.


End file.
